This is all so different
I should have known it wasn't over
Nothing ever is.
I thought I was over you. I thought everything was moving forward, slowly but surely moving.
But as usual the shit that's more than skin deep is still caught up.
Not like I wanna rewind or something. The opposite. I just want to be free of you.
But part of me wants to know if it hurts you like it hurts me sometimes. I wanna know if it was real or if it was just a pretty picture I painted for years.
One step at a time. It'll get better. There's no easy fix. For years you were mine. Now to think of anyone else taking that place... Its hard to wrap my head around. Its hard to accept.
Life goes on. And I hope sooner than later you won't be on my mind when I don't want you to be.
I want to be free.
Free of the flashbacks at inconvenient times.
Free of waking up alone and being a little sad.
Free of second guessing my moves.
Free of the what once was, and make something new.
Free of you being my one and only.
Its hard to undo it when you let someone so far under your skin.